Chapter 22: Mr. Horn

Dong, dong, dong—

The distant morning bell pierced through the misty curtain of rain.

Across the hundreds of streets and thousands of alleys of the capital, wisps of cooking smoke began to rise in the wake of the tolling bell. The towering imperial palace in the north opened its gates, and civil and military officials, adorned in their colorful court robes, filed through the Thousand-Step Corridor.

Dongfang Liren stood behind a screen, clad in a silver bodice embroidered with a "chubby dragon." With arms outstretched, she allowed her handmaidens to dress her. Her gaze drifted past the screen, fixing on the distant palace grounds, where a palanquin surrounded by a hundred attendants was moving toward the Taiji Hall.

"The Emperor rose a cup of tea’s time late today. What is the reason?"

An elderly woman with white hair stood behind her, responding respectfully: "Last night, the Empress Dowager went to the Yongle Palace and stayed the night. Her Majesty enjoys heart-to-heart talks; the Emperor likely stayed up too late conversing with her."

"The Emperor handles ten thousand matters of state daily and is already exhausted. How can he endure being kept up for idle chatter by the Empress Dowager at night?"

"Perhaps I should make arrangements to invite the Empress Dowager to stay at the Prince's mansion for a few days?"

Dongfang Liren considered this for a moment and nodded in agreement.

Once her python-patterned robe and jade belt were fastened, Dongfang Liren sat in her top-floor study and opened the reports organized by the Black Yamen to review intelligence from across the provinces.

"Several incense masters of the Red Flower Pavilion have left their posts simultaneously; it seems they are planning something big... What is the Red Flower Pavilion up to? Are they mobilizing in full force to annihilate the Water-Cloud Sword Pool?"

The white-haired woman pondered, "Impossible. While the Old Spear Master was alive, the Red Flower Pavilion had the mettle to destroy the Water-Cloud Sword Pool. But as it stands now, they must tread carefully around the Sword Pool. I hear that the branch masters of the Red Flower Pavilion meet every year; they are likely discussing the future of their organization."

"The Red Flower Pavilion has a significant public presence, and their hidden channels must be even more vast; they are truly wealthy enough to rival a kingdom. If they can no longer survive in the pugilistic world and wish to pledge loyalty to this Prince, I may give them a chance."

"Understood."

Dongfang Liren ceased her focus on the Red Flower Pavilion and continued scanning the reports.

"A merchant caravan entered the pass from Liangzhou, and 'Blood Bodhi' seems to be hidden among them... Who is Blood Bodhi?"

"A killer who rampaged through the southern pugilistic world ten years ago. He is stained with countless debts of blood. Once, after assassinating the Prefect of Chongzhou, he was hunted by the imperial court and the Jianghu alike, disappearing without a trace until now."

The white-haired woman’s eyes were grave. "His martial arts are unknown, but he is skilled in mechanisms, hidden weapons, and disguise. His patience is astonishing; he once lurked near the Seven Profound Sect for nearly a year just to assassinate their sect leader. He passed the target many times without striking, waiting until the man’s vigilance was completely gone before delivering a fatal blow and vanishing. His reappearance now may mean he has been recruited by the 'Green Bandits'."

Upon hearing this, Dongfang Liren’s brows knitted tightly together.

"If the Green Bandits have recruited such a top-tier assassin, their target must be a high-ranking court official or this Prince. Have the Black Yamen keep an eye on anyone who has arrived from Liangzhou recently..."

As she said this, Dongfang Liren suddenly remembered Ye Jingtang, who had just arrived in the capital from Liangzhou. However, Ye Jingtang was only eighteen; the age did not match, so she dismissed her suspicions.

After finishing the reports from the Black Yamen, Dongfang Liren rose and walked to the balcony, surveying the city within and outside the imperial walls. Not long after, she noticed her older cousin, Wang Chihu, sneaking out of the Black Yamen while clutching something to his chest.

Dongfang Liren frowned and asked, "What is Wang Chihu up to again?"

"Yesterday afternoon, Ye Jingtang came to visit, intending to capture the Wingless Owl. He requested the Yamen's assistance and borrowed some items from Wang Chihu."

Dongfang Liren did not believe Ye Jingtang had the capability to capture the Wingless Owl, so she became curious and turned to ask, "What did he borrow? Cartilage-softening incense? Soul-severing needles?"

"Uh..."

The white-haired woman hesitated, finding it difficult to deceive the Prince of Jing. She walked up to Dongfang Liren and whispered a few words.

Dongfang Liren listened quietly, a rare flush rising to her heroic cheeks. She frowned, "Is he out of his mind?"

"Sigh, for the sake of official business, Your Highness shouldn't dwell on such minor details..."

...

Early summer light rain fell into the old bluestone alley, where a faded wine banner swayed silently under the eaves. In the stable next to the tavern, a spirited horse stood resting, its nostrils still snorting with heavy, labored breaths.

"Hiss—hiss—"

There was no one else in the tavern. Two whispers came from the window:

"Did you bring the item?"

"I brought it."

"What is it?"

"A dildo."

"A... what?"

In the tavern, Ye Jingtang, dressed in a black robe and wearing a bamboo hat like a wandering knight, sat at the table. He took the sandalwood box handed over by Wang Chihu, his expression strange.

Perhaps afraid of ruining his reputation, Wang Chihu was highly alert. He used his body to block the view of the tavern keeper and his staff, whispering, "This object is carved from a single piece of jade. The raw material alone is worth over a thousand taels, and it is the work of a master craftsman from the previous dynasty. Those who have used it are either imperial concubines or high-ranking noblewomen. After the founding of the Great Liang, it changed hands several times before ending up in the Ding'an Marquis’s mansion..."

Ye Jingtang looked at the exquisite sandalwood box, not daring to open it. "Brother Wang, I asked you to help me find an item that is not fit for polite society, but this is... this is too excessive. This item..."

Wang Chihu’s expression was solemn. "Working for the imperial court, one need not concern oneself with such trifles. Brother Ye, can you think of anything else that is even less fit for polite society?"

Ye Jingtang truly could not. He had thought that asking the Prince of Jing for a silk bodice was outrageous enough; he never imagined Wang Chihu could find something even more absurd.

However, this item certainly did not look like something the government would use as bait. It would be scandalous if news of it leaked, but its value and provenance would definitely attract a thief like the Wingless Owl. It was, in fact, perfect.

After studying the box for a moment, Ye Jingtang put it away. "I have truly troubled you, Brother Wang. I will certainly not fail your expectations and will bring the Wingless Owl to justice."

"We are both working for the court; there is no need for thanks. I have already sent informants into the city to stir up rumors. You just need to go and sell the stolen goods, and whether you succeed depends on your luck. I must go now, farewell..."

Ye Jingtang watched Wang Chihu sneak away, then looked at the sandalwood box in his hand. After much hesitation, he decided not to open it, wrapped it in black cloth, and left the shop.

The drizzle continued, and the streets were sparse. After circling a few times to ensure he was not being followed, Ye Jingtang entered a small alley.

Luo Ning and Zhe Yunli were waiting under an umbrella, dressed as an ordinary mother and daughter. Birdie was perched on the wall, keeping watch. Seeing Ye Jingtang return, Zhe Yunli trotted over and asked, "What did the Black Yamen give you as bait?"

Ye Jingtang dismounted. Unable to speak clearly, he handed the black-wrapped box to Luo Ning. "It’s an improper object. I haven’t opened it, and Lady Luo, it would be best if you didn't either, lest you become angry."

?

Luo Ning took the box and weighed it—it didn't feel like a "silk bodice."

"If you don't look, how will you sell it later?"

Luo Ning opened the box, but fearing a trap, she leaned toward Ye Jingtang so they could look together. Zhe Yunli, hearing "improper," could not suppress her curiosity and leaned in as well.

Whoosh—

The sandalwood box opened, revealing a deep red fabric. Inside lay a crystal-clear, emerald-green jade artifact. Even an amateur could see its immense value from the extraordinary carving and its lustrous color.

As for the shape... it was thick and large!

Ye Jingtang blinked, not knowing what to say.

Zhe Yunli was stunned, leaning in to examine it closely. "Wow! Such a large... masterpiece. This piece of jade must be worth a fortune, though the shape is a bit strange..." She reached out to touch it.

Luo Ning hadn't realized what it was at first, but upon closer inspection of the shape—the lifelike veins and the head of the jade phallus—

Slap—

The box slammed shut, nearly catching Zhe Yunli’s fingers.

"Master’s wife, what are you doing?!"

Luo Ning’s face turned bright red, and she shoved the box toward Ye Jingtang. "You little thief..."

Ye Jingtang, anticipating this reaction, caught the box steadily. "This is public property for the investigation. If you break it, will you pay for it?"

Zhe Yunli, unaware of the object's purpose, asked like a curious child, "Master’s wife, why are you angry? What is this used for? ...Ouch!"

Her head was tapped by Luo Ning.

Luo Ning, perhaps fearing Zhe Yunli would be corrupted, suppressed her shame and anger, explaining softly, "It’s an object used in brothels by men. It’s dirty, don't ask."

Zhe Yunli blinked her large eyes. "With such a large rod, isn't it used to bully women? How is it used... hiss—"

Luo Ning, like a mother who had reached her limit, could only pull Zhe Yunli’s ear. "I told you not to ask! You’re a young lady, is it proper to ask about such things?"

Zhe Yunli, in pain, quickly raised her hands. "Fine, fine, I won't ask. I just wanted to help save Hero Chou... Then shall we go to the black market to sell the goods?"

Luo Ning, holding such an unseemly object, could not take Yunli with her. "Since we are luring the snake out of its hole, three people will only alert the enemy. Your light-body skills are mediocre, and you can’t help much. Go back and stay put!"

Zhe Yunli was clearly unhappy, but facing her stern teacher’s wife, she could say nothing. She sighed softly and walked away, looking back every few steps.

Ye Jingtang had been holding back laughter. As soon as Zhe Yunli left, Luo Ning’s expression turned cold as she glared at him. "You are shameless!"

Ye Jingtang’s smile froze, and he asked, baffled, "Why am I shameless? This is an item from the government. I told you not to look, but you insisted. Now that you’ve seen it, you call me shameless. It’s just a jade carving; is there any need for such a reaction?"

As a mature woman, even without experience in the affairs between men and women, Luo Ning had heard from the women of the Pingtian Sect about how such objects were used. That Ye Jingtang had handed her a woman’s "self-pleasure" object without warning—how could she not be angry?

But since the fault wasn't entirely his, Luo Ning suppressed her shame and anger, saying in a low voice, "How can the imperial court be so shameless as to make you use this..."

"It works, that’s all that matters. If you were the Wingless Owl and learned that you had stolen this object to sell, only for it to become a joke in the pugilistic world, wouldn't you be furious?"

Luo Ning considered this and said nothing more. Ye Jingtang handed her the box again, signaling her to carry it.

"What are you doing?"

"Carry it!"

Ye Jingtang stuffed the sandalwood box into the hands of the disgusted Lady Luo. "I am a man, the head of the household. Does it look right for me to be walking behind you carrying that box?"

"..."

Luo Ning gritted her teeth, but eventually took the box and held it against her chest.

Ye Jingtang placed Birdie on his shoulder and led his horse out of the alley. "We will disguise our identities as a pair of traveling thieves. From now on, I will call you Ning'er, and you will call me..."

Luo Ning walked behind him, her voice cold. "I’ll call you 'Winged Owl'."

"Are you joking?"

Ye Jingtang turned his head to look at Lady Luo, who was dressed like a young bride. "How about 'Husband'? A young couple traveling the pugilistic world together is less likely to arouse suspicion."

Luo Ning was certainly not pleased, but there was no other relationship that could explain why a man and a woman were traveling alone. She thought for a moment and said, " 'Husband' is too formal. People in the Jianghu don't usually call each other that. Hmm... shall I call you 'Master Ye'?"

"Master Ye?"

Ye Jingtang knew the idiom about "Master Ye being arrogant," so he shook his head. "That doesn't sound very good."

"Then 'Tang-lang'?"

"Chirp?"

Birdie tilted its head, likely wondering—where is the mantis?

Ye Jingtang suddenly felt that his foster father’s naming sense was truly unreliable. How was his future wife supposed to call him?

After some deliberation, Ye Jingtang remembered the title "Third Lady" and decided, "Call me Fourth Brother, then. Hmm... the surname is Huang. Huang Silang."

"Huang Silang..."

Luo Ning felt there was no issue with that and said nothing more.